


vanity fair • chuck bass [gossip girl]

by morbidlypicturesque



Category: Gossip Girl (TV 2007), Gossip Girl (TV 2007) RPF
Genre: F/M, High School, Multi, Mutual Pining, New York, Non-Judging Breakfast Club (Gossip Girl), Personal Growth, Slow Burn, Teen Romance, Upper East Side, rich kids, wholesome friendship despite their flaws
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:55:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25647667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morbidlypicturesque/pseuds/morbidlypicturesque
Summary: "𝘏𝘦𝘺, 𝘪𝘧 𝘸𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵, 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘶𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸–𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴–𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘭."Thea Johnson, Blair Waldorf and Serena van der Woodsen had the world underneath their heels - well, the world that mattered. New York’s Upper East Side was their playground, a haven of filthy rich, spoiled rotten children with overflowing trust funds and ambiguous morality.Until Serena disappeared to a boarding school without a warning, leaving her best friends bitter and betrayed.But the beginning of their Junior year at Constance Billard/St. Jude’s brings back an old face. It’s certain - Upper East Side is about to be shaken. Gossip Girl will make sure of that.
Relationships: Carter Baizen/Serena van der Woodsen, Chuck Bass/Blair Waldorf, Chuck Bass/Original Female Character(s), Dan Humphrey/Blair Waldorf, Dan Humphrey/Serena van der Woodsen, Louis Grimaldi/Blair Waldorf, Nate Archibald/Blair Waldorf, Nate Archibald/Jenny Humphrey, Nate Archibald/Serena van der Woodsen, Theodora Johnson/Carter Baizen, Theodora Johnson/Chuck Bass
Comments: 11
Kudos: 28





	1. Chapter 1

**𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫**

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**"** 𝘎𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘱𝘎𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 **,** 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘔𝘢𝘯𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘢𝘯 **'** 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘦 **."**

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**[** 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭 **]**  
  


𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘴  
𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐨𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐚 𝐣𝐨𝐡𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧

  
  
𝘭𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘴

𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐟

𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘸𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘢𝘴

𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐝

  
𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘸𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘢𝘴

𝐜𝐡𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐬

𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘴

𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐚 𝐯𝐚𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐬𝐞𝐧

𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘯 𝘣𝘢𝘥𝘨𝘭𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘴

𝐝𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐩𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐲

* * *

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐑

_i do not own Gossip Girl, only my original characters - Theodora Johnson and her family. all rights belong to Cecily von Ziegesar and The CW._

_this story will contain use of alcohol and drugs, profanity, sexual scenes, mild violence and triggering topics._  
  


* * *

  
  
**soundtrack**  
  
  


i. 𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐘 lana del rey

𝘛𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘳 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘨𝘰

𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘕𝘦𝘸 𝘠𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘊𝘪𝘵𝘺  
  
  
  


ii. 𝐀𝐒𝐊 𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐘 olly murs

𝘞𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘦, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘸𝘦 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸

𝘔𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘨𝘰  
  
  
  
  


iii. 𝐃𝐎 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐀 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖? arctic monkeys

𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘸?

'𝘊𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘥𝘰

𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘐'𝘮 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘣𝘶𝘴𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘯𝘦𝘸  
  
  
  
  


iv. 𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐀𝐈𝐑 panic! at the disco

𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦

𝘚𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦

𝘓𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵  
  
  
  
  
  


v. 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐔𝐒 abba 

𝘖𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺, 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭

𝘚𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘪𝘮𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧, 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘥, 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭

𝘞𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭  
  
  
  
  
  


vi. 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐆 𝐆𝐎𝐃 halsey

𝘏𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘖𝘩, 𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘺 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘦'𝘳𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘣𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴

𝘐'𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯

𝘐𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦'𝘴 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘥, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴  
  
  
  
  


vii. 𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐇 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 hall & oates 

𝘏𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘳𝘺, 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯

𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯

𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸  
  
  
  
  


viii. 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐅𝐓 𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐌𝐍 fall out boy

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘣𝘰𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵? 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘯

𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸:

𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘯  
  
  
  
  


ix. 𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐀 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋'𝐬 𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 m. monroe 

𝘛𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦, 𝘏𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘺, 𝘞𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘯, 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵

𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘢 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘢 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘢 𝘭𝘢𝘸𝘺𝘦𝘳

𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭'𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥  
  
  
  
  


x. 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐌𝐄 sum 41

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨'𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶

𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰, 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘦

'𝘊𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦: 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶  
  
  
  
  


xi. 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐘𝐎𝐔 scorpions

𝘐𝘧 𝘸𝘦'𝘥 𝘨𝘰 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯

𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵

𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦

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**_XoXo, Gossip Girl_ **


	2. 𝐢. 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐬

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which an old friend returns to the hot asphalt and even hotter gossip of NYC

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**i. the return of S**

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If you ever happened to live on the Upper East Side, you'd know that here your social status is measured the good old fashioned way — by the zeroes on your bank account.

Consequentially, your friends are bound to be the sons and daughters of powerful CEO's, bank managers and lawyers and their philantrophic, blow-dried wives with a prescription drug addiction and a gardener-turned-lover in the closet.

Filthy rich and spoiled rotten by the wealth they inherited, the young Manhattan elite occasionally covered their ambiguous morality and debaucherous tendencies with polite nods and photogenic smiles they reserved for their unsuspecting parents and their successful friends.

And on one such occasion, a Sunday before their Junior school year began, all the parents and children that _mattered_ found themselves as guests of Eleanor and Blair Waldorf for an elegant soiree of champagne and reminiscing about the well spent summer at the Hamptons, Monte Carlo or the Amalfi Coast.

To be fair, Waldorf's knew how to throw parties - Blair and Thea's double birthdays were the talk of the year, not to mention the famous annual slumber party.

But tonight, Thea Johnson was _bored_.

She couldn't really mingle with other parents as her's didn't bother showing up. Not that they couldn't, anyway, as her father was wrapping up his newest film in Australia and her mother was — _at least that's what the latest tabloid issue said_ — on a party yacht somewhere along the African coast.

It hardly bothered her anymore. Her parents would continue to disappoint her until they die.

Lingering in the doorway of the Waldorf living room, Thea swept the room for her best friend and usual partner in crime, Blair. An hour ago the brunette had snatched her nervously, anxiously trying to ask her something before she was swept away by her commandeering mother.

Instead, her eyes fell on a familiar male figure lounging over the couch, flanked by Kati Farkas and Isabel Coates - Blair liked to call them their minions but Thea preferred slaves. It had a nicer ring to it.

Surpresing a groan of annoyance in preparation, Thea unglued herself from the doorway only to plop down in the armchair opposite the trio, careful not to spill the gin & tonic in her glass over her new _Armani_ dress.

"Bass, did you see Blair anywhere? I need to talk to her."

If their little group could be called a _friend group,_ Chuck Bass was a textbook example of a bad boy, a chronic womaniser in the making. The fact that his father was one of the richest CEO's in New York only added to the charm of his boyish smirk.

"Our dear hostess disappeared with her loverboy minutes ago. I'm pretty sure I know what they are up to." The Bass heir took a sip of his scotch, not hiding the way he scanned her appearance top to bottom.

"Fancy trying out their pass-time, Johnson? Those navy pleats go dashingly with your tanned legs."

He was definitely not wrong — the short sleeved dress she chose for tonight pressed tightly over her body, flaring high above her knee. Two white stripes across the sleeves allowed the last of summer's spirit into her outfit, paired with a pair of white strappy sandals.

"Sometimes I wonder why I tolerate you, Charles." He was an inevitable company if she wanted to hang out with her best friend Nate, who was conveniently also Blair's boyfriend. Not that she minded, but he was a far more pleasant company far from the public eye.

"It's my irresistible charm, Theodora, you know you love it."

She only snorted instead of an answer, downing the rest of her drink and getting up to find more interesting company. Or more alcohol, whichever appeared first. Not even a second after, her phone emitted a familiar beep of a notification.   
  


**"s** **ᴘᴏᴛᴛᴇᴅ** **ᴏɴ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ɴᴇᴡ** **ʜᴀᴠᴇɴ** **ʟɪɴᴇ** **.** **ʜᴇᴀᴅᴇᴅ** **ᴛᴏᴡᴀʀᴅ** **s** **ᴍᴀɴʜᴀᴛᴛᴀɴ** **.** **ᴀɴ** **ᴇᴇʀɪʟʏ** **ʙᴇᴀᴜᴛɪ** **ғ** **ᴜʟ** **ʙʟᴏɴᴅᴇ** **.."**   
  


The snap of the said blonde only proved the dreaded - Serena van der Woodsen, her best friend — _or was it former best friend now?_ — was back in town after her mysterious disappearance last December. Thea's heart plummeted to her stomach.

"Fuck, fuck, _fuck_.." She sang under her breath, trying to calm the rising bout of panic surging through her body.

She had to find Blair before she read the blast herself.

Struggling to reach the staircase without bumping into any of the guests, she was stopped by a familiar voice of Lily van der Woodsen.

"My goodness, Thea you've turned into a woman since the last time I saw you! How was your summer dear?" Serena's mother gushed, her perfectly botoxed face tanned and relaxed. _Must have gotten rid of the husband number four... or was it five?_

Thea plastered a polite smile on her face, eager to get out of the woman's sights before it was too late. "A rotation between here and the Hamptons as usual, mostly with my friends. Some sailing with the Archibalds."

Alas, the fate was certainly not on the side of the Johnson heiress, as Mrs van der Woodsen was followed by the hostess herself, Eleanor Waldorf.

Thea didn't have many mother figures in her life; sure there was her maid and former governess Etta who managed her penthouse, Nate's mother Anne Archibald who always tugged her along where ever their family went and Eleanor who always insisted on Thea spending the holidays at their place.

Thea did not have one conventional mother, but those three women gave her all the love and warmth they gave their own children.

"Lily darling, just who I was looking for!" The two women exchanged a courteous peck on the cheek. "I was just talking with my girls how much we missed you for the Summer in the city charity brunch! I hope it was nothing serious?"

Thea's heart swelled at the way Eleanor referred to her and Blair as _her girls._ Lily smiled, though it was not as sincere as before.

"We had some family matters, but nothing to worry about." The blonde woman assured. She turned to Thea, only to be cut off. "In fact, Thea, I just heard from Ser-"

Eleanor Waldorf's exclamation was enough to make all the heads at the party turn.

"Serena van der Woodsen?! Is that you?"

Like a deer caught in headlights, Serena stood at the top of the staircase, looking uncomfortable over all the attention she was getting.

Her friend looked wonderful: there was no doubt the boarding school did wonders for her skin, now tanned and cleaner than ever. _Of course_ , it complimented her effortlessly styled hair blonde hair, beachy and voluminous as ever.

"Look everyone ! It's Serena!" Serena gave the crowd an awkward wave before spotting Thea.

"Thea! I missed you." The two embraced, Serena squeezing her tightly before separating.

"Hello Serena, long time no see." The Johnson gave her a tight lipped smile, the girls holding each other at arms length. It was weird to see her after almost a year of unexplained absence.

"Where have you been? How are you?" _How dare you show your face here after what you've done?_

Before any of them can say a word more, Thea spotted a disheveled Nate coming down from Blair's room. Her eyes narrowed at the look that passed between Serena and Nate, an unspoken but definitely felt exchange.

"Serena." Blair materialised before them, blocking Nate's view of the blonde, enveloping her into a just a bit too forceful hug.

If she didn't know her better than she knew herself, Blair would have looked the part of an ecstatic best friend, overjoyed to see Serena after such a long time. "I'm so happy to see you! Come -- we're just about to have dinner."

"Yes! We want to hear all about your adventures in the Cote D'Azur this summer. If there's anyone who can make the French love America.."

Serena lifted her head, shooting a look at her mother who stood near by. "Actually.. there's somewhere I have to-"

"You're leaving?"

"I'm not feeling that well. But I just wanted to say hi." Serena looked as if she wanted to bolt out of the room

"I'll see you at school tomorrow."

"School?" Blair blurted out in surprise, before she could stop herself. Then more quietly: "So you're back for good."

The two friends stared down the staircase at Serena's retreating form, unsure what to feel, what to do.

In no time, the teens of the party were vigorously typing away on their phones, reporting the dramatic return of the one and only Serena van der Woodsen to the true ruler of the Upper East Sider's lives - Gossip Girl. 

**ᴡᴏʀᴅ** **ɪ** **s** **ᴛʜᴀᴛ** **s** **ʙᴀɪʟᴇᴅ** **ᴏɴ** **ʙ** **'s** **ᴘᴀʀᴛʏ** **ɪɴ** **ᴜɴᴅᴇʀ** **ɴɪɴᴇᴛʏ** **s** **ᴇᴄᴏɴᴅ** **s.** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ᴅɪᴅɴ** **'** **ᴛ** **ʜᴀᴠᴇ** **ᴇᴠᴇɴ** **ᴏɴᴇ** **ʟɪᴍᴏɴᴄᴇʟʟᴏ** **.** **ɢᴜᴇ** **ss** **ɪᴛ** **'s** **ᴛʀᴜᴇ** **\--** **ʏᴏᴜ** **ᴄᴀɴ** **'** **ᴛ** **ɢᴏ** **ʜᴏᴍᴇ** **ᴀɢᴀɪɴ** **...**   
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


It was well after midnight when the guests started excusing themselves, thanking the hostesses for a wonderful evening and ventured out in front of the building to wait for their chauffeurs.

Thea spent the entire dinner glancing between Blair and Nate, both picking disinterestedly at their food without a word between them.

Nate disappeared before she managed to corner him, so she resorted to a _"Need to speak with you ASAP. Idiot."_ message. Damage control would just have to wait until tomorrow.

The limo's window rolled down to reveal a smirking Chuck. "Miss Johnson you look ravishing tonight. May I offer you a cruise to paradise?"

"I prefer a highway to hell these days, Bass."

"Oh I'll ride any way you want me." The boy tried winked suggestively, turning on his Bass charm, but it was obvious he was drunk out of his shoes.

"That sounds desperate, honey. Sweet dreams." She slapped the roof of the limo twice as the sign for the driver to go.

"I'll dream of you!" He called, head peaking from the window as it rolled down the Fifth Avenue.

She couldn't help but to chuckle at his antics. It hadn't always been like that, their dynamic banter, but she unwillingly enjoyed it. "You better!"

A tired looking Blair walked out of the building to where her friend was waiting for her driver to pick her up. The petite brunette looked shaken up, arms wrapped around herself.

"Want me to pick you up in the morning?" Thea offered, though she was sure nothing could soften the blow Serena delivered showing up so unexpectedly, causing nothing but turmoil.

"A cup of caffeine before the fray sounds amazing." Blair sucked a large breath of air, unsure what to say. "Nate was just.. Weird after Serena left. Why does she have to ruin everything?"

"We'll see what she has to say in her defence tomorrow. Night B." Thea bent down quickly to kiss her friend's cheek before jumping into the waiting limo.

"Night T."  
  


**ᴅɪᴅ** **s** **ᴛʜɪɴᴋ** **s** **ʜᴇ** **ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ** **ᴡᴀʟᴛᴢ** **ʜᴏᴍᴇ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ᴛʜɪɴɢ** **s** **ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ** **ʙᴇ** **ᴊᴜ** **s** **ᴛ** **ʟɪᴋᴇ** **ᴛʜᴇʏ** **ᴡᴇʀᴇ** **?**   
******ᴅɪᴅ** **ʙ** **ᴛʜɪɴᴋ** **s** **ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ** **ɢᴏ** **ᴅᴏᴡɴ** **ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ** **ᴀ** **ғ** **ɪɢʜᴛ** **?**   
**ᴀɴᴅ** **ᴡʜᴏ** **s** **ᴇ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇ** **ᴡɪʟʟ** **ᴛ** **ᴛᴀᴋᴇ** **,** **ʜᴇʀ** **ʟᴏʏᴀʟ** **ǫ** **ᴜᴇᴇɴ** **ʙ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴘʀᴏᴅɪɢᴀʟ** **s?**   
**ᴏʀ** **ᴄᴀɴ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **s** **ᴇ** **ᴛᴡᴏ** **ʜᴏᴛᴛɪᴇ** **s** **ᴡᴏʀᴋ** **ɪᴛ** **ᴏᴜᴛ** **...**   
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


The first day of school could be considered the most important day of that school year — if you assert yourself as the leader, it was not likely your position would be endangered for the year. Those were the rules that applied for most of the prep schools around, and Constance Billard was no exception.

Unfortunately for the Waldorf and Johnson heiresses, a new player returned to the board.

The Constance Billard chapel buzzed with anticipation from the moment Serena burst in, windswept hair and shirt, rocking her unintentionally on purpose look she adopted as her own.

Headmistress Queller took the stage, droning on and on about their privilege to tutor such fine young women into becoming accomplished.

Thea's gaze went right through the woman and the stained glass window behind her, wishing nothing more than the woman to stop justifying the enormous tuition fee bills they delivered to their parents.

"Ladies. Please join me in welcoming back, after a year's absence, Serena Van der Woodsen. Previously serving as assistant editor of Yearbook, co-chair of the Community Outreach Program and captain of the tennis team, she was one of our most esteemed students." The headmistress gave Serena a tender, almost motherly look.

"And so on behalf of the women of The Constance Billard School, we are thrilled to have you back, Serena." Both Thea and Blair scowled as the girls around them clapped for the returning _it girl_ of Constance Billard.

_Oh look at innocent little Serena blushing under the applause... if I didn't know better, I'd say she's Virgin Mary reborn. Though she's very far from a saint..._   
  
  
  


* * *

  
  


On the steps of The Met sat the mean girls with their Queen, little Jenny Humphrey nervously waiting for her lunch-time audience with Blair and her judgement on the party invites she offered to do.

Isabel snatched one from the shoebox of invites, gasping in surprise. "Soooo cute."

"They should be framed or something." Kati squealed, examining the intricate calligraphy on the invitations.

"Not bad work..." Blair paused for the sake of dramatics, before extending one to the blonde in front of her. "And here is yours, as promised."

"Thanks. Thank you." The girl almost jumped from joy, but kept her cool in front of the most important person on the Upper East Side. If she wanted to survive, she had to be in Blair Waldorf's good graces. "Thank you. I know I said thank you already but -- thank you."

In her line of sight Blair noticed Serena's approaching figure, a cup of yoghurt in hand, heading straight for where they sat. She shot her minions a warning look. "Hide your invitations. Quick."

The three of them returned the invites into the shoebox, Is placing it behind her in an attempt to hide it. It was unfortunate Serena wasn't dim enough not to notice the glimpses of busting, hiding something.

"So our tuition money definitely does not go to the food." Serena attempted to lighten the atmosphere. She noticed the new blonde addition to the group, quickly extending her hand in greeting.

"Hi. I'm Serena."

"I know. I mean. I'm Jenny." The blonde tried to appear as natural as possible, though she was bouncing on the inside. _She just shook hands with SVW!_

But then Serena saw it — under Katy's bag -- an invitation. She casually reached over and pulled it out from underneath it.

"When's the party?" Serena questioned casually, ignoring the awkward side-eyes the girls exchanged with one another. Holding their breath, they waited for Blair to react 

"On Saturday. And you're kinda not invited." Blair's charming smile spat venom at Serena's fallen face.

"Only because everyone thought you were at boarding school until twelve hours ago. Now the tables are full. Plus, Ginny used up all the invites." Blair gestured to Jenny, looking moderately uncomfortable to be caught in the middle of the storm between the two. "But if you wanted we could try and work something out --"

Kati and Is, ever the loyal pair of poodles, had their eyes trained on the exchange between the two, deep down hoping they _never_ cross Blair in any form.

"No. That's okay. I have a lot of stuff to do anyway." Serena let the invitation drop from her hand, not buying the story for a second.

"I bet you do, I mean, a year of absence changes a lot of things."

Serena's head snapped to the left; a few steps beneath them stood Thea Johnson, hands placed on her hips and shooting daggers directly at her. Even in the navy plaid skirt and a matching headband on her head, Thea Johnson looked ready to kill.

If Blair was the Queen, in that moment Thea was most likely an Empress.

"We should get going. Unless you want us to wait for you. Looks like you have a lot of yogurt left." Blair's confidence restored, she stood up from the Met steps, minions following shortly behind.

"No. Go ahead." Serena whispered, more to herself than anyone else, as she watched the girls she used to call best friends strut down the road without her.   
  


**s** **ᴇᴇɴ** **ɪɴ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴅɪɴɪɴɢ** **ʀᴏᴏᴍ** **ᴀᴛ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴄᴏɴ** **s** **ᴛᴀɴᴄᴇ** **ʙɪʟʟᴀʀᴅ** **s** **ᴄʜᴏᴏʟ** **ғ** **ᴏʀ** **ɢɪʀʟ** **s:** **ᴀɴ** **s** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ʙ** **ᴘᴏᴡᴇʀ** **s** **ᴛʀᴜɢɢʟᴇ** **. s** **ʜᴀᴍᴇ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **s** **ᴛᴀɴᴅᴏ** **ғғ** **ᴡᴀ** **s** **ʙʀᴏᴋᴇɴ** **ʙʏ** **ǫ** **ᴜᴇᴇɴ** **ᴛ** **,** **ᴡᴇ** **ᴅᴏ** **ʟᴏᴠᴇ** **ᴀ** **ɢᴏᴏᴅ** **ᴄʜɪᴄᴋ** **ғ** **ɪɢʜᴛ** **.**   
  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


On Saturday evening Thea stood in the lobby of The Palace hotel, waiting for Chuck to get ready for the party. Nate and Blair were supposed to pick up the two of them in a matter of minutes, and yet there was still no sign of the Bass heir.

She contemplated going up to his suite several times but in the end decided against it, for the sake of her eyes and mental health.

Adjusting the straps of her silver dress foe what seemed a millionth time in the last fifteen minutes, she failed to notice someone inching towards her from behind.

"Serena spilled the beans." Thea jumped in surprise, turning to look at Chuck's smirking face. Her mouth fell open in surprise, already aware of what he was hinting at.

"So now you know too? God, by next week the entire New York will know Serena deflowered Nate." The brunette groaned, going past the reception and out of the hotel, Chuck following closely behind.

The slap of chilly September air did wonders to clear her head, mulling over the ways Blair might execute her when or if she found about her knowledge of Nate and Serena's affair. "I just hope Blair doesn't find out I knew the entire time, or she'll hang me naked, upside down and burn my Louboutins."

Chuck just threw his arm around her, laughing at the way her face fell when she mentioned her prized shoe collection in possible mortal peril. "Don't worry, your Bass in the shining armour will save you from the Evil Queen."

It was her turn laugh now, and the boy beside her couldn't help note the way her dark red lips stretched over her teeth, full and soft.

Just then a limousine arrived, the door bursting open to reveal a beaming Blair, waving them over. "Come on you two!"

"T, you look hot!" Blair grinned as Thea and Chuck slid onto the seat opposite of her and Nate. The strapy silver dress Thea wore promised to be the talk of the evening; a-line and light as air, it fell down mid-thigh to reveal her tanned legs and equally extravagant peep toe heels littered with tiny sliver butterflies.

"I can say the same to you, hostess." They all laughed, Chuck procuring and opening a bottle of champagne with a satisfying _pop!_ Nate took a joint out of his suit jacket, lighting it and passing it around the limo.

As the first taste of alcohol for the night hit her taste buds, Thea smiled. They picked up Isabel and Kati on their way, the limo turning into a proper preparty. _It was so good to be back to school._  
  


* * *

  
  
  


The place Thea and Blair chose for the party - Barney's Co-op building — was overflowing with high-end guests, Upper East Side teens ready to christen the new school year with copious amounts of booze and illegal substances.

They stood observing the party, pleased with their work. No expense was spared in throwing it — the decorators transformed an old factory into a night time version of Central Park, finished off with dazzling lights and several bars positioned in the corners of the room.

It was a perfect kick- off for the party season, until Kati and Is started to complain.

"This party sucks. I wonder what Serena is doing." Kati voiced obnoxiously, typing away on her phone.

"I wonder if she's at an AA meeting." Isabel mused dreamily, turning to her friend. "Maybe we should go to AA. The guys there are really cute."

"I love bad-boys."

Blair looked like she was about to pop an artery, or at least strangle the two. "Who _cares_ what Serena's doing. Get out there. And look like you're having fun." She barked forcefully, pushing the two airheads towards the dance floor.

Once the two disappeared, Blair turned to her with a nervous whisper. "The party doesn't suck, right?"

Thea wrapped her arm around Blairs shoulders in a comforting manner. "B, you're the queen of organisation. Trust me when I say the party is great. You want me to get you a drink?"

"A _martini bianco_. You're the best." Her friend shot her a thankful smile before turning to look for her boyfriend.

In a mass of twirly black dresses and suit jackets, Serena stood out as a sore thumb in her casual street style. In a matter of seconds after she entered the room, all eyes were on her, the teens whispering among themselves of _the nerve_ she had to crash another of Blair's parties.

"Oh my God is that-"

"But I thought Blair said she's not invited?"

From the distance she could see Blair grabbing Nate as he headed for the entrance, conveniently just where Serena stood, and by the looks of Blair's furious eyes there was a ticking time bomb in the Archibald-Waldorf relationship and it was only a matter of time it imploded. He pulled out of his girlfriend's grip, walking past Serena and out of the building.

Downing both her and Blair's drink, Thea saw the opportunity to confront the backstabbing blonde she called her friend.

"What are you doing here? You weren't invited. And last I know you were supposed to be in some stinky Brooklyn hellhole."

Serena rolled her eyes in annoyance, already sick of Thea's _holier-than-thou_ attitude. "Dan's sister called him, said she it was emergency. Apparently Chuck is being his creepy, molesting self."

"Huh good luck with that, knowing him he already deflowered her in the ladies room." Thea giggled spitefully, well knowing Chuck's taste for ruining the reputations of innocent little freshmen. Not that she was any better — it was enormous fun to give them hell for the first few weeks of school.

The tall blonde looked as if she had an epiphany, moving away from Thea. "Yeah, ladies room... I've gotta go."

"You better. And stay out of Blair's sight!" Thea called after Serena, already disappearing into the sea of glittering teens.

The dance floor was buzzing from the blonde's sudden appearance, hundreds of eyes searching for the reaction of her former best friends. Thea, determined not to feed their gossip starving minds, turned to look for her company.

She didn't get far though, as the new beat flooded the room, making her join the sea of dancing bodies on the floor. It drummed in her head, hips swaying in an intoxicating rhythm she loved. It was the drinks and the dancing why she adored going out, whether it was clubbing on a Friday night or a wild house party.

The booze was finally starting to hit when Thea noticed Serena and the two Humpties, Humpies - _whatever their unimportant last name was_ — coming down from the stairs leading from the roof, the guy's sister head bowed in embarrassment, mascara running down her face from tears. 

A rumpled Chuck stumbled out of nowhere, his shirt torn and nose a bloodied mess. Dazed from the bathroom ordeal with Dan, he limped over to where a tipsy Thea now also joined Blair on the side, observing the party.

Thea noticed his battered form first, cringing at his sorry state. "Did Brooklyn boy fix you up?"

"Shut up." Chuck shot her a glare, holding his signature scarf to his bleeding face.

"You don't mess with little sisters, you douche."

"She better not show her face again." Blair's tone of voice held a warning as the three of them watched Serena enter a cab with the Brooklyn kids.

For as long as she'd known her, Blair felt inadequate to almost anyone around her. It was why she built a strong facade for the world, a protective shield in the form of her Queen B status.

Outside, Blair Waldorf shined with confidence of a movie star, but on the inside, Thea knew her insecurities ate her alive.

It was no wonder her best friend was completely wrecked by Serena's return, the perfect, effortless Serena who attracted the attention of every person around her, like moths drawn to a light.

Chuck shrugged lamely, wiping the trickling blood from his lips. "I'm actually hoping she will."

Thea pursed her lips, hand shooting out to pinch Chuck's side. The Bass heir let out a girlish _ouch_.

"I'll hit you on the other eye. Come on let's put some ice on that. And a _martini_ in me." She tugged him along, both stumbling from the liquor still running through their veins.

All around the party teens typed away at their phones, feeding the gossip chain, reporting back to the one and only Gossip Girl. It was safe to say the Kiss on the Lips was a memorable event, and the night had only just begun.

**ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴏɴʟʏ** **ᴛʜɪɴɢ** **ᴍᴏʀᴇ** **ғ** **ᴜɴ** **ᴛʜᴀɴ** **ɢᴏɪɴɢ** **ᴛᴏ** **ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴇ** **s** **ɪ** **s** **ᴛᴀʟᴋɪɴɢ** **ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ** **ᴛʜᴇᴍ** **.** **ʟᴏᴏᴋ** **s** **ʟɪᴋᴇ** **ɪ** **'** **ʟʟ** **ʙᴇ** **ʙᴜ** **s** **ʏ** **. s** **ᴏ** **ᴜɴᴛɪʟ** **ɴᴇ** **x** **ᴛ** **ᴛɪᴍᴇ** **.** **ʏᴏᴜ** **ᴋɴᴏᴡ** **ʏᴏᴜ** **ʟᴏᴠᴇ** **ᴍᴇ** **.**


	3. 𝐢𝐢. 𝐛𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which there's no brunch like a Bass brunch

* * *

## 𝐢𝐢. 𝐛𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬

* * *

**ɪ** **ʙᴇᴛ** **ʏᴏᴜ** **'** **ʀᴇ** **ᴡᴏɴᴅᴇʀɪɴɢ** **ᴡʜᴀᴛ** **ɢᴏ** **ss** **ɪᴘ** **ɢɪʀʟ** **ɪ** **s** **ᴅᴏɪɴɢ** **ᴜᴘ** **s** **ᴏ** **ᴇᴀʀʟʏ** **.** **ᴛʀᴜᴛʜ** **ɪ** **s,** **ɪ** **ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ** **ᴡᴇɴᴛ** **ᴛᴏ** **ʙᴇᴅ** **.** **ᴡʜʏ** **ᴡᴀ** **s** **ᴛᴇ** **ᴘʀᴇᴄɪᴏᴜ** **s** **ᴛɪᴍᴇ** **ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍɪɴɢ** **ᴡʜᴇɴ** **ᴡᴀᴋɪɴɢ** **ʟɪ** **ғ** **ᴇ** **ɪ** **s s** **ᴏ** **ᴍᴜᴄʜ** **ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ** **.** **ɪ** **s** **ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ** **ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ** **ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ** **ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ** **ᴛʜᴀɴ** **ᴀ** **ʟᴀᴢʏ** **s** **ᴜɴᴅᴀʏ** **?** **ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴘᴀᴘᴇʀ** **ɪɴ** **ʙᴇᴅ** **, s** **ɪᴘᴘɪɴɢ** **ᴄᴏ** **ғғ** **ᴇᴇ** **, s** **ᴄʀᴀᴍʙʟɪɴɢ** **ᴀɴ** **ᴇɢɢ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴛᴡᴏ** **.**

**ʏᴇᴀʜ** **,** **ʀɪɢʜᴛ** **.**

**ᴡᴇ** **ᴜᴘᴘᴇʀ** **ᴇᴀ** **s** **ᴛ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇʀ** **s** **ᴅᴏɴ** **'** **ᴛ** **ᴅᴏ** **ʟᴀᴢʏ** **.** **ʙʀᴇᴀᴋ** **ғ** **ᴀ** **s** **ᴛ** **ɪ** **s** **ʙʀᴜɴᴄʜ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ɪᴛ** **ᴄᴏᴍᴇ** **s** **ᴡɪᴛʜ** **ᴄʜᴀᴍᴘᴀɢɴᴇ** **,** **ᴀ** **ᴅʀᴇ** **ss** **ᴄᴏᴅᴇ** **,** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ᴀ** **ʜᴜɴᴅʀᴇᴅ** **ᴏ** **ғ** **ᴏᴜʀ** **ᴄʟᴏ** **s** **ᴇ** **s** **ᴛ** **ғ** **ʀɪᴇɴᴅ** **s.** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ᴇɴᴇᴍɪᴇ** **s.** **ᴄʜᴜᴄᴋ** **'s** **ᴅᴀᴅ** **,** **ʙᴀʀᴛ** **ʙᴀ** **ss,** **ɪ** **s** **ʜᴏ** **s** **ᴛɪɴɢ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴀɴɴᴜᴀʟ** **ʙʀᴜɴᴄʜ** **ғ** **ᴏʀ** **ʜɪ** **s ғ** **ᴏᴜɴᴅᴀᴛɪᴏɴ** **.** **ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴏɴᴇ** **ɪ** **s** **ɪɴᴠɪᴛᴇᴅ** **.**

**ᴡᴇʟʟ** **...** **ɴᴏᴛ** **ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴏɴᴇ** **.**   
  


* * *

There were a few things Thea noticed when she woke up, apart from the splitting headache as a result of the last night's party.

First **,** itwas most definitely not her bed she was sleeping in. Or her shirt. In fact, it was a male pink Ralph Lauren shirt that loosely hugged her figure, and she could think of only one person on the Upper East Side who'd have enough of style confidence to wear it in public.

Slowly peeling her head from the pillow and wiping the drool from the corner of her lips, she noticed an intricately woven sign of Palace Hotel on the hem of the pillow.

Despite the throbbing in her head she reluctantly slipped out of the silky smooth covers and onto the cold marble floor, the coolness of it underneath her feet slapping her awake. Faintly she could hear someone's voice coming from the other room.

Hand over her eyes in an attempt to block out the blinding sunshine coming through the curtains, Thea dragged herself from the bedroom and into the vast living room of the suite.

"I won't forget. Yes, Thea is here, too. I'll wake her up, she had a rough night."

Even drowsy and pathetically hungover, she'd always recognise Nate's sleepy drawl as he finished his conversation and flung his phone back on the table. 

"Oh God, how drunk was I?" She asked, picking up her phone from the coffee table. Four missed calls from Blair, two text from Serena that she deleted without opening, and one from Etta.

 **ɢɪᴠᴇɴᴄʜʏ** **ғ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ʙʀᴜɴᴄʜ** **ᴏɴ** **ʏᴏᴜʀ** **ʙᴇᴅ** **.** **ᴅᴏ** **ɴᴏᴛ** **ʙᴇ** **ʟᴀᴛᴇ** **ғ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴅɪɴɴᴇʀ**.

Nate shifted his body on the sofa to make some room for her. "It wasn't so bad, but you fell asleep in the limo, and we were kind of too afraid to face Etta on our own."

To be fair, Etta Schmidt was an intimidating figure, with her greying hair permanently tied in an immaculate bun on her head and an iron fist with which she kept Thea's habits in check and out of public eye.

The German immigrant was primarily employed a decade ago as a nanny for the Johnson girl, but as the number of occupants of their Upper East Side penthouse decreased over the years until only Thea remained, she took on the responsibility of a maid, a governess, and on most occasions a guardian.

The Archibald heir would never forget the way she dressed him down in a horrifying mix of English and German for putting a cup of coffee on the glass table without a proper placemat underneath.

A smile played on her lips as she scrolled through the endless sea of Gossip Girl alerts from last night. "Mhm, clever boys. Was that Blair?"

"Nathaniel! Theodora! Keep it down! Some of us are trying to regain our strength." A raspy voice called out from the bed on the other side of the screen. Thea craned her neck only to see a groggy Chuck still tangled with two girls he must have spent the night with.

"Your dad's brunch is today."

"The alarm is set for nine." Chuck replied, though he'd be quite content to skip the brunch entirely. It was bound to be just another of Bart's ego lifting events when he tried to present himself as a respectable businessman and even better father. The latter was painfully far from the truth.

"It's ten already." Nate groaned, stretching his arms over his head. Even for a five star hotel, the sofa was uncomfortable to sleep on, especially for someone as tall as him.

Two brunettes scurried out of the bed, grabbing their belongings. Chuck emerged from the bedroom right after them, wrapped in a purple robe and a sleepy smirk on his face.

"I'll be sure to tell my father just how enthusiastic you both are about the hospitality industry."

Chuck ushered them to the door, Thea and Nate watching on in amusement.

"Could you bring us some coffee? And water, lots of water."

"And bring me two butter croissants." Thea managed to call after the two girls before Chuck slammed the door in their face. "All I've consumed in the last day and a half was gin, a few martinis and I lost count when we switched to vodka."

"You forgot the champagne in the limo." Chuck helpfully supplied, making his way to the bar only to stop in his tracks once he actually notice what was Thea wearing. His eyes widened slightly, following the line of her leg and the way it covered just enough to leave the important things to the imagination. Like the colour of her panties, for example.

"Damn Johnson, you look hot in my shirt. You should wear it more often."

A deep blush covered her cheeks as she tried to pull the shirt down but it reached down only to the middle of her thighs. Thea turned to Nate with a pleading look.

"Please tell me he wasn't the one that changed me."

"He tried but I defended your virtue." For that, Thea stood on her tiptoes to press a loud kiss on Nate's cheek in thanks.

"That kid popped you pretty good, huh? Never mess with a guy's sister." Nate advised as he sat himself down on one of the bar stools across the counter. What had been a swollen red bruise last night turned into a proper black eye, courtesy of Serena's new boy toy.

"If I knew his name I'd hunt him down and kill him." Chuck said darkly, though it was hard to take him seriously as he stood before them in his fluffy monogrammed slippers and velvet robe.

Thea squeezed her eyes, trying to recall the name. "It's something like Humpy, Humpty? Irrelevant."

"What, ''cause you kill people now? Are you gonna strangle him with your scarf?" Nate joked, throwing the ridiculous scarf into his face only for Chuck to catch it as he went around the bar.

"Don't mock the scarf, Nathaniel. It's my signature." Chuck replied, taking out the ingredients for his famous hungover cure juice out of the cupboards. 

"So straight of you Bass." Thea smirked at the death glare he sent her way, both aware of the underlying meaning and event she was talking about.

"Just saying, death by scarf: Not that intimidating." Nate shrugged, leaning on his hand. The other two couldn't help but notice how his jokes didn't hold the same enthusiasm as before.

Chuck rolled his eyes, now adding a few drops of some unidentifiable liquid into the mixture. "He sucker-punched me, I told you. Besides, better a broken nose than a broken heart."

"What? I didn't even talk to Serena last night." Nate lamely attempted to defend himself. None of the two were buying his act.

"You didn't have to." She took one of the glasses of green blend Chuck made, only to place it down as soon as the sharp, bitter smell hit her senses. "Oh my God what did you put in this? I think I'm gonna puke."

"That's matcha and green magma, you uncultured witch. And who said anything about Serena?"

Instead of answering, Nate opted for the less bitter option and reached for his glass of lush green smoothie.  
  


* * *

If there was one thing Thea appreciated concerning any kind of social gathering, it was that the seating plan in most cases remained the same: Thea, Chuck, Kati, Isabel, Blair and Nate, and once upon a time, Serena.

Thea was just about to ask Blair if there was a chance Eleanor could get them a pass to Ralph Laurens fashion show at New Yorks fashion week that was just around the corner when Blair suddenly noticed something behind her head.

"You've got to be kidding me!"

Blair's hateful exclamation made the heads on their table turn to where she was looking. Blair was not to only one to express her feelings of distaste as Serena and her new boy toy walked casually through the door, quite obviously uninvited.

"This should be fun." Chuck grinned, sinking back into his chair.

Thea stabbed one of the fluffy Japanese pancakes on her plate, envisioning her former best friend as strawberry jam slowly trickled down them. "Don't enjoy it too much."

"Oh please, as if you don't get a drama hard on." Chuck winked, throwing one of his arms over the back of her chair. The brunette threw him a dirty look, turning back to her food. There was bound to be some drama coming their way in the near future and she was damned if she didn't make the most of the delicious selection of treats served.

It was common knowledge — you can't serve a delectable revenge on an empty stomach. 

* * *

  
  
  


"I love a good brunch, it's a perfect excuse to pair waffles and Bellini's in public and nobody questions it." Thea admitted to Stacy Burlington, an up and coming fashion editor for _Elle_. The blonde laughed, proceeding to tell her just how delighted she would be to see her in the front row of the DKNY fall show she was assigned to cover.

At first she only came up to her to make an impression — it was always good to have acquaintances on important places that you might need to exploit in the future.

But after conversing with her for almost a quarter of an hour, they decided they had several things in common: they both adored 80s movies and abhorred the Karadashian sisters that seemed to have popped out of nowhere and filled every tabloid page in America. Stacy seemed like a person she/d love to be friends with, a bright and innovative fashionista she could share a latte with and discuss the beauty of vintage cinema. If only Thea had time for normal friendships.

"Please excuse me Stacy, but I'll find you later. You have to tell me all about these Manolo's you are wearing." She apologised once she spotted Valerie Spencer, her brother's highschool friend turned family friend, waving her over to where she stood with an older woman, dressed head to toe in vintage Chanel. 

"Thea, I would like you to meet Ellen Macarty, chairwoman of the committee for Sotheby's Annual Christmas Charity Auction." The two shook hands, Thea meeting Valerie's look with a stunned expression.

Val only gave her a wink and a thumbs up from behind Ellen, disappearing back into the crowd with her familiar bouncy step. She was one of the only people that knew how much she wanted to score a place as a donator for Sotheby's auctions; it was not only considered an immense social springboard but also a valuable opportunity to invest in her name.

"It's absolutely delightful to meet you Mrs Macarthy. I'm an avid fan of your auctions." Thea managed to blurt out, bubbling with excitement. Not only was Ellen one of the richest women in New York, but also someone you'd call an old money lady.

Ellen smiled, the crows feet around her eyes wrinkling. "Why thank you. Congratulations on your purchase of that gorgeous Fruit the Bois bracelet."

"Well, you know, some people invest in real estates, some in cars, but I find diamonds to be most fulfilling." 

"After assessing your previous charity experience, the board has come to an agreement to accept your request and place your name on the list for this year's donators. Will you be able to come by my office on Tuesday so we can discuss which item will you be giving for the auction?"

"Of course, I'll be there." Thea breathed out, a cocktail of butterflies flying around her stomach.

"We are hoping that your name and social status might bring along some of the newer generation." Ellen explained, and Thea knew she shouldn't be so offended they only wanted her for the possibility of bringing in new customers. In most cases it was that, or worse, on behalf of her mothers family. It was a selfish word they lived in.

"Would you excuse us? I have to steal her away for a moment." Chuck interrupted their conversation, a picture of politeness. Ellen smiled looking between them.

"Of course, it's a lovely brunch your father organised."

"Why did you pull me away from my new best friend, Bass?" Thea hissed.

Chuck rolled his eyes, hand on the small of her back to push her forward. "Because my father is coming over and I'm not drunk enough to deal with him on my own. And he likes you."

"Wishful thinking, Bart only likes himself." She scoffed, changing her expression into a wide smile just as the man of the hour stepped in to greet them.

"Mr Bass, I have to say you've gone all out." She said, gesturing vaguely at the entire set up, though the human statues creeped her out a bit.

Bart flashed her one of his shark-like grins. "Thea, you look fantastic. How's your grandpa? Enjoying retirement?"

"Well, if you call retirement trying to bribe me into working for him, then he is having the time of his life." Thea joked dryly. Even at ninety, grandpa David couldn't stop meddling in his family's affairs, and he made a point to mention her possible apprenticeship in one of their firms. Most of them obeyed the old patriarchs wishes but Thea was determined to carve her own way into the spotlight, not with the help of her grandfathers money and connections.

"You should look up to her, Charles, young, beautiful and ambitious. I might have to start bribing you myself." Thea tried to mask her discomfort with another fake laugh, and she could feel Chuck's shoulders tensing beside her. 

"Son, the, uh, the invitation said 'Black Tie' not 'Black Eye'. Are you ok? I mean if you're in some kind of trouble..." Bart trailed off, examining the blossoming purple of Chuck's eye.

"Only of my own making."

"Why do you think I do all this, huh? This party is for you. Ok, so you can meet people. You know, become a part of something, make some kind of change."

"Really? I thought it was another excuse for an open bar and, eh, re-hiring the Milanese statues." Chuck bit back, hitting right in the real-estate mogul's nerve.

"Do me a favour, will you? Lose the scotch... it's barely noon." Bart snapped, giving one last look of distaste to the glass in his sin's hand and walked away from the pair.

"Am I allowed to deeply detest your father?" Thea glanced at Chuck, silently fuming as they watched Bart mingle joyfully with his colleagues and friends.

Chuck simply threw back the remainder of his drink. "Be my guest."

Some out of pity and some out of being a decent human being, an idea popped into Thea's head and she grabbed Chuck's arm. "I've got some concealer in my purse, come with me."

"Johnson, sneaking me in the bathroom? I knew you were into crazy stuff."

Instead of giving into his teasing, she decided to play along for a while. "You don't know the half of it." She winked, tugging him along through the corridors of the Palace.

First she poked her head inside the ladies room to check if there was anyone inside to witness her, or God forbid take a photo of her sneaking Chuck Bass into a lavatory.

"The coast is clear, get inside."

She pushed some towels in his hands as she rummaged her purse for the concealer stick. "Put this paper towel in front of you so I don't stain your shirt by accident."

He leaned his back on the row of marble lavatories, a towel neatly tucked into the collar of his shirt like a baby bib. Thea stepped closer to him, having to stand between his legs to reach the bruise on his eye.

"Well, Johnson, you pressing so tightly against me might become a problem." His warm breath smelt like the scotch he downed minutes prior, and there was nothing she wanted more than to slap the smug smirk off his face.

"For you, maybe." She ignored the way his sparkling eyes followed her delicate movements as she applied a generous coat of concealer over the blooming purple around his eye, blending the product with her pinky to match his skin tone.

"Don't tell me you don't feel the connection between us." He went on, and for a moment Thea went into a panic mode. They were standing very close, maybe even too close for her liking. "It's electric."

"Definitely, short circuit." She stepped back, relatively satisfied with her work. A _ping!_ of her phone alerted her of another notification.

**ᴀᴛᴛᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴ** **:** **ᴛ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ᴄ** **ᴊᴜ** **s** **ᴛ** **s** **ᴘᴏᴛᴛᴇᴅ** **s** **ɴᴇᴀᴋɪɴɢ** **ɪɴᴛᴏ** **ʟᴀᴅɪᴇ** **s** **ʙᴀᴛʜʀᴏᴏᴍ** **ᴛᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ** **.** **ɪ** **s** **ɪᴛ** **ᴊᴜ** **s** **ᴛ** **ᴜ** **s** **ᴏʀ** **ɪ** **s** **ᴛʜɪ** **s** **ʙʀᴜɴᴄʜ** **ɢᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ** **ʜᴏᴛᴛᴇʀ** **?**

"Goddamit already!?" Thea threw her hands up in exasperation, cursing the brevity of the one and only Gossip Girl. She turned to the boy in the white suit who was smirking at the text of the blast.

"You're ruining my rep!"  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Without even a minute of rest, as soon as Thea and Chuck emerged from the toilets they ran straight into Blair's perfectly French manicured claws.

"I can't believe Serena came to this brunch. I told her to stay away." Blair ranted, halfway to a panic attack already.

"When did Serena ever do something she was told?" It was an understatement to say Serena had a problem with authority, and if the rumours that circulated through Upper East Side were true, it was a trait she inherited from her mother.

"You worried about Nate? Just a shot in the dark. I think you know what you need to do to get his attention." Chuck produced a key from the inner pocket of his suit jacket and placed it into Blairs hands. 

"And what's that?"

"A key to my suite, Nate's heart and your future happiness." He replied smugly, placing a hand over his heart. "I'm _honoured_ to be playing an even small role in your deflowering. "

"Ew, Chuck!"

"You're disgusting."

"Yes, I am. So why be shy? Just grab Nate and finish this. Report back with details." Moderately creeped out, but determined, Blair headed to find her boyfriend.

"No, don't, I do not need to know the details of my best friends sex."

"I do!" Chuck retorted.

"Go get him tiger!"  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


Not even fifteen minutes later, an overly cheery Blair Waldorf stormed from the elevators, making a beeline for an unsuspecting Humphrey boy in the crowd. Thea was just in the middle of conversation with Kati and Isabel, if you would call them gushing over her white and red Givenchy dress a conversation, when she spotted the incoming tornado that was Waldorf wrath.

Serena came next with Nate hot on her heels. It seemed that the suite plan most definitely didn't work out. Not even bothering to excuse herself, Thea left the minions and pushed through the people in an attempt to reach the train wreck of an argument that was about to ensue.   
  
  


"Whats going on here?" Thea asked, noting the upset look all of them wore. 

Blair threw Serena a venomous smile. "We were just getting to that."

"Blair, please, don't do this." Serena begged though they all knew it was futile; when Blair's mind was set on something there was no amount of begging that would help.

"Sorry, did you want to tell him?" She questioned her.

"I'll tell him." By some unknown magic only he possessed, Chuck materialised next to them just in time to make some more mess.

It was Blair and Nate's turn to look completely horrified. " _You know?_ "

"I know everything." He retorted smugly.

"Did you tell him?" Blair asked her best friend, almost accusatory.

"Of course not, he just likes to put his nose in other people's business."

All the while the buzz cut Brooklyn kid stood there, completely confused. "And apparently I know nothing."

"Look, Dan, it was a long time ago and I regret it..." Serena started, trying to piece together some way she could admit her mistakes to him that wouldn't end up in him hating her.

"Look, Serena, stop trying to pretend you're a good girl. So you slept with best friend's boyfriend. I kind of admire you for it." Thea slapped his arm for the insensitivity.

"Is that true? " The guy - Thea finally put the pieces together and realised his name was Dan - asked Serena quietly, but the guilty look on her face spoke more than words.

"Well, then she ran away and lied about it." Thea added, looking at Serena.

"I just thought you should know before you fall head over heels for your perfect girl in her perfect world... and then get left all alone with no one but your _Cabbage Patch Kid._ " Blair mockingly pouted.

" _Cabbage Patch_? Did you talk to my sister?"

"Ah, yes, little Jenny. Do believe she and I have some unfinished business." Chuck remembered the blonde, smirking slightly just to provoke Dan.

"You stay away from her."

"Poor devil, so little time so many sluts to-" Dan reacted, pushing Chuck who, like a domino effect, crashed into a waiter causing them both to fall down. The ruckus alerted the rest of the hall to turn around and watch the unfolding of the embarrassing scene. Kati and Is even took out their cellphones in an attempt to film the whole ordeal and presumably send it to their resident Gossiping blog. 

"It's fine! It's fine! Everyone can stop looking. He's a jerk. But it's my fault and... and I'm leaving." Humphrey apologised to the crowd,

Thea stood in front of him, her freshly manicured nail pointed threateningly in his direction. "You crash a party you were not invited to and then punch the host's son, you're lucky I don't have you arrested."

"I'll go with you." Serena offered immediately.

"Actually, I'd prefer if you didn't." He turned his back to a crestfallen Serena, exiting the Palace Hotel with quick strides.

That morning Dan Humphrey experienced just the tip of the iceberg that was the complicated social hierarchy of Upper East Side's children and all their convoluted relationships that came with the pedigree. It seemed that the Brooklyn boy just wasn't ready for the challenge.

"Hope you're happy." Nate told Blair, his tone harsh and accusing.

His girlfriend threw him one last dirty look before she walked off. "Not even close."

Thea grabbed his arm before he had the opportunity to leave, too. "You cheated on her, with our best friend. Either try to remedy that or I'll kick your ass, best friend or not."

**s** **ᴏᴍᴇ** **ᴍɪɢʜᴛ** **ᴄᴀʟʟ** **ᴛʜɪ** **s** **ᴀ** **ғ** **ᴜ** **s** **ᴛᴇʀᴄʟᴜᴄᴋ** **,** **ʙᴜᴛ** **ᴏɴ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴜᴘᴘᴇʀ** **ᴇᴀ** **s** **ᴛ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇ** **,** **ᴡᴇ** **ᴄᴀʟʟ** **ɪᴛ** **s** **ᴜɴᴅᴀʏ** **ᴀ** **ғ** **ᴛᴇʀɴᴏᴏɴ** **.**

"Looks like it's just you and me. Apparently my room's available if..." With one very smooth motion Chuck tried to wrap his arm around her waist — and she had almost let him, but the rational part of her brain quickly intervened.

"Keep dreaming."

"Trouble in paradise." He stated as they watched Nate leave the hotel while Blair joined Kati and Isabel in some brainless small talk, one of her artificial everything is perfectly right smiles plastered over her face.

Thea smoothed out some invisible wrinkles on her dress. "Paradise is for amateurs, I'm all in for a little bit of Hell."

"Theodora, you naughty girl." Chuck sent her an appreciative look, intrigued by the brand new side of the girl in front of him.

"You were right, it was getting kind of boring around here." They shared an equally wicked smirk, the Bass devil and the Johnson heiress finally finding a common cause.

"Ready for round two?" He extended her a flute of champagne he swapped from the passing waiter. The sound of clinking glasses was a music to her ears, and the taste of bubbles somehow more luscious than before.

"Oh yes."

**ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ** **ᴏᴜᴛ** **ᴜᴘᴘᴇʀ** **ᴇᴀ** **s** **ᴛ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇ** **,** **ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ** **'s** **ᴀ** **s** **ɪɴ** **ғ** **ᴜʟ** **ᴀʟʟɪᴀɴᴄᴇ** **ɪɴ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ɪᴛ** **'s** **ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ** **ᴛᴏ** **ʀᴀɪ** **s** **ᴇ** **ᴀʟʟ** **ᴋɪɴᴅ** **s** **ᴏ** **ғ** **ʜᴇʟʟ** **.**   
  
  
  



	4. iii. burning ivies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which they attempt to serve a sizzling revenge, only for it to bite them in the back

* * *

## 𝐢𝐢𝐢. 𝐛𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐬

* * *

 **ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ** **'s** **ᴘʟᴇɴᴛʏ** **ᴏ** **ғ** **ᴜᴘ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇ** **ᴛᴏ** **ʙᴇɪɴɢ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **s** **ᴘᴀᴡɴ** **ᴏ** **ғ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ғ** **ᴀʙᴜʟᴏᴜ** **s** **ʟʏ** **ᴡᴇᴀʟᴛʜʏ** **,** **ʙᴜᴛ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴅᴏᴡɴ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇ** **, s** **ᴜᴘᴇʀ** **s** **ᴜᴄᴄᴇ** **ssғ** **ᴜʟ** **ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛ** **s** **ᴇ** **x** **ᴘᴇᴄᴛ** **ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ** **ʟᴇ** **ss ғ** **ʀᴏᴍ** **ᴛʜᴇɪʀ** **ᴏ** **ғғs** **ᴘʀɪɴɢ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ᴡʜᴇɴ** **ɪᴛ** **ᴄᴏᴍᴇ** **s** **ᴛᴏ** **ᴄᴏʟʟᴇɢᴇ** **ᴛʜᴀᴛ** **ᴍᴇᴀɴ** **s** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ɪᴠʏ** **'s.**

 **ɪᴛ** **'s** **ᴍᴏʀᴇ** **ᴛʜᴀɴ** **ᴊᴜ** **s** **ᴛ** **ɢᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ** **ɪɴᴛᴏ** **ᴄᴏʟʟᴇɢᴇ** **,** **ɪᴛ** **'s s** **ᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ** **ᴀ** **ᴄᴏᴜʀ** **s** **ᴇ** **ғ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ʀᴇ** **s** **ᴛ** **ᴏ** **ғ** **ʏᴏᴜʀ** **ʟɪ** **ғ** **ᴇ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ғ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴛʜᴏ** **s** **ᴇ** **ғ** **ᴇᴡ** **ᴡʜᴏ** **ᴀʀᴇɴ** **'** **ᴛ** **ʟᴇɢᴀᴄɪᴇ** **s,** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴘʀᴇ** **ss** **ᴜʀᴇ** **s** **ᴀʀᴇ** **ɴᴏ** **ʟᴇ** **ss.**

 **ᴡʜᴇɴ** **ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛ** **s** **ʜᴀᴠᴇ** **s** **ᴀᴄʀɪ** **ғ** **ɪᴄᴇᴅ** **ғ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴛʜᴇɪʀ** **ᴄʜɪʟᴅʀᴇɴ** **'s ғ** **ᴜᴛᴜʀᴇ** **,** **ᴡʜᴀᴛ** **ᴋɪᴅ** **ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ** **ᴡᴀɴᴛ** **ᴛᴏ** **ʟᴇᴛ** **ᴛʜᴇᴍ** **ᴅᴏᴡɴ** **?**  
  


* * *

  
  


"Do you remember when Dad gave me my first Yale sweatshirt? I don't think any piece of clothing has ever fit me more perfect, not to mention how adorable I found that bulldog. Remember when I though about getting a bulldog?" Blair babbled, gradually leaning further and further into the table until she nearly met the tablecloth with a dreamy expression on her face.

Her best friend scoffed slightly, before smiling through her haziness of early rising. She missed the endless lie-ins that came with summer break. "Good thing I made you change your mind. What were you thinking, Blair Waldorf taking care of another living creature?"

Blair gave it a moment of consideration before nodding in agreement. "Soon Nate and I will be at college, him going down to Yale, me going up to Dartmouth. Dad flying in for the Princeton game... "

"And we'll sit together on the stands, though I'll have to root for Princeton, so it's gonna be like a forbidden friendship," Thea gushed, spooning some of the yoghurt and granola parfait into her mouth.

Unlike most of her friends, Thea had no parent pressure concerning her choice of college. Her father was a Yale dropout that ended up pursuing his acting career path instead of the one set up for him in his family empire, and her mother preferred to spend her overflowing trust fund on exuberant parties instead of tuition fees. But, if she wanted to achieve something on her own, Thea knew she'd have to roll up her sleeves and go all in.

Princeton seemed like the natural way to go.

Dorota was quick to silence them as she brought in their green tea's, dissatisfied at the amount of food they consumed.

"Eat up Miss Blair, Miss Thea. Your mom would want you to have a good breakfast," she complained, nudging them with freshly baked croissants. Neither of them corrected her in calling Eleanor Thea's mother, too.  
  
  


* * *

  
  


Thea Johnson hated many thing; she hated platform heels with a burning passion, and _E! Network_ with their brain damaging shows, the last season's Zac Posen pret-a-porter collection and rap music. But above all, she abhorred every kind of physical exercise that required sweating, running or wearing gym shorts.

For that exact reason she sat on the bleachers while her classmates participated in an intense field hockey game, watching as they pushed each other around and drinking in the shy rays of afternoon sunshine.

Over turning another page of Wilde's masterpiece she had to read for English class, she spied Blair and Serena sneering at each other in the middle of the field — or more precisely, a soon-to-be battlefield. Sure, Blair _might_ have made an effort to knock Serena onto the ground every time she passed her, tripping her with her hockey stick or pushing one of their Barbie slaves in Serena's direction.

The blonde was taking it pretty well, the white of her polo shirt turning various shades of green and brown. That is, until she snapped, finally ready to retaliate with full force.

A sudden commotion caused her to drop the book entirely and bolt down the bleachers; out of nowhere, Serena ran over to Blair and knocked her into the ground. Her friends struggled and tugged at each other's hair as they rolled around the muddy field until the referee and several other students managed to pry them apart.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Thea marched over to the tall blonde, putting all her strength into pushing her backwards. It would've looked hilarious from afar, if the brunette wasn't fuming with rage.

"Oh come on, she's obviously not even hurt!" Serena crossed her arms in annoyance

Blair took that as a perfect opportunity to fall onto the ground, giving the class her very best act. If she hadn't know better, Thea would have thought her friend broke her ankle.

With a triumphant smirk and crossed arms, Thea turned to meet Serena's wide eyes. Around them girls and teachers rushed to help Blair into the school's infirmary, careful as not to injure her ankle any further.

"Enjoy detention, _bitch_."

 **ʜᴇʏ** **ᴜᴘᴘᴇʀ** **ᴇᴀ** **s** **ᴛ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇʀ** **s.** **ᴡᴇ** **ʜᴇᴀʀ** **ᴛʜᴀᴛ** **ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ** **ᴡᴀʀ** **ᴛ** **ʜʀᴇᴇ** **ᴊᴜ** **s** **ᴛ** **ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ** **ᴏᴜᴛ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ɪᴛ** **'s** **ᴡᴇᴀʀɪɴɢ** **ᴋɴᴇᴇ** **s** **ᴏᴄᴋ** **s.** **ᴄʜᴏᴏ** **s** **ᴇ** **ʏᴏᴜʀ** **s** **ɪᴅᴇ** **ᴏʀ** **ʀᴜɴ** **ᴀɴᴅ** **ʜɪᴅᴇ** **.** **ᴡᴇ** **ʜᴀᴠᴇ** **ᴀ** **ғ** **ᴇᴇʟɪɴɢ** **ᴛʜᴀᴛ** **ᴛʜɪ** **s** **ᴏɴᴇ** **ɪ** **s** **ᴛᴏ** **ᴛʜᴇ** **ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ** **.**  
  
  


* * *

  
  


Instead of the shopping spree the girls had planed for the afternoon, the four; Blair, Thea, Kati and Is now sat in Blair's living room, the girl in distress lying dramatically on her chaise.

"I can't _believe_ Serena did this," Kati muttered, bending down to bring a straw closer to Blair's lips. As soon as she straightened up, Is was applying a cold compress to her leg.

"Yeah, such a cheap shot," the other agreed.

"She obviously learned her manners in Bronx," Thea added drily, rolling her eyes as Blair ordered Kati and Is around like two lost puppies, quick to answer all her whims and wants.

Just about to throw the last month's Vogue on the growing pile of magazines next to her seat, the brunette was startled by a familiar name flashing on her phone's screen, making her stand up immediately. "I'll be right back, it's my agent."

Neither of the three noticed her stealthily hiding the screen, or remembered the fact that Thea didn't have an agent.

" _Finally_ ," Thea answered the call with a sigh of relief, making her way out of the living room, as far as possible from Blair's constant whining.

There was an amused chuckle on the other side before Chuck's voice flooded over the line. "Hello to you too. I heard about the field hockey throw down. All those mouth guards and short skirts, I hope somebody filmed it."

Thea couldn't help but scoff, face screwing in distaste. He was infamous for his appetite but _really_. "You're abhorrent, Chuck."

"That's probably why you called," Thea smiled slightly at his words as she closed the door of Blair's bedroom behind her.

"Don't you read me like a book. How long have we known each other for Chuck?" She started amicably, in a tone that clearly had a favour coming up.

"Long enough that I know you're not that complicated as you like to pretend," he said.

It was true, to a certain measure, that she enjoyed the inherent pretentiousness of her upbringing. "Serena came home for a reason," she started, making her way around the room, pacing, thoughts running a hundred miles per hour.

"One can only guess."

"Well, I'm done guessing," she cut off his circumlocution. "I want answers and no one likes to be on the ground floor of a scandal like Chuck Bass."

"I am a bitch when I wanna be," came his reply, smug as ever. Thea smiled slightly, leaning against the cream wall of the room.

"Opportunity to cause some trouble, uncover a secret. Dig up some dirt," she trailed off, knowing she'd piqued his interest the moment she asked him to call her as soon as school was over.

"Love it when you talk dirty," came Chuck's low answer from the other side. She hung up, as content as a cat that caught a delicious canary and went back to the girls, only to be greeted by Blair's scowling face.

"What took you so long?"

"Just dealing with some stuff," she gave the three a dazzling smile, sitting down opposite from Blair's chaise again, her best friend throwing confused looks her way.

"Don't worry, everything is absolutely _perfect_."  
  
  


* * *

  
  


"Admit it; even for me this is good," Chuck gestured at the incriminating photo of one and only Serena Van Der Woodsen caught just as she was exiting Ostroff Centre.

The two were bent over the flashing computer screen in Thea's room, searching for clues and more importantly, any detail that could be used against the beautiful, tall blonde that made her best friend's life miserable.

Chuck took the opportunity to walk around the room of the one and only Thea Johnson, letting his fingers glide over white-painted woodwork and tastefully decorated shelves lined with leather bound books and various sentimental trinkets.

It was a funny thing, he concluded, how you could discover dozens of hidden layers of another person just by taking a peak into the room they spent their most private time at.

He was snapped from his analytical musings by Thea's sharp chuckle. "If you weren't such a perv, I'm sure the CIA would hire you in a second," opening one of the several _Ladurée_ boxes that could be found in her room, she fished out a pen and made some notes on the papers in front of her. Leave it to her to meticulously organise a revenge.

"You think your brother could find me a spot? Defending my country, there's a future I never imagined," he stopped his pacing to stare at one of the rare neatly framed photographs in the room. It was the man in question, Lawrence Johnson, on what must have been his graduation day, elegantly dressed as a naval officer. One of his arms was thrown over a young girl's shoulders - Thea's, he realised — who looked up to her brother with utter adoration.

"With good reason. And my brother is in the Navy, not CIA." Thea enlarged the photo in question on her laptop in hopes of catching some detail they could have missed.

"What is she doing there?" It was a rehabilitation centre, that much was sure and obvious. It was not a secret that Serena had a turbulent history with narcotics — hell, she was the first of them to try the most popular ones offered to the naive Manhattan elite.

But while Chuck and Nate chose the least lethal of the paths, smoking pot every once in a while, and Thea limited her 'white-powdered escapades' to once or twice a year, Serena tended to regularly overindulge, make a scene and wind up on the latest magazine cover.

That is, until she magically disappeared off the face of the earth a year ago.

"Well, what's anyone doing there? It's a facility for the disturbed and addicted." Thea swivelled in her chair, finally coming to face him. If she had a cat on her lap, Chuck thought, she's make a frighteningly good impression of Vito Corleone.

"Then she must have been admitted to the Charles Bass wing," the brunette smirked, making him grin and shake his head, continuing his languid stroll around her room. He could never quite understand why she let Blair hold the entire spotlight, when she had the power and the gut to hold the title of the Upper East Side queen, but now he was more than determined to find out who exactly was Thea Johnson beneath the facade she presented to the rest of the world.

  
"You don't get nearly enough credit for your wit," he commended, enjoying the way the corners of her eyes crinkled at the compliment. "So the question is what do you do now?"

"Oh, I was thinking total social destruction," Thea threw him a satisfied smile from her chair. It was always hers and Blair's thing — the scheming and plotting until each and every one of their enemies had no choice but to bow down to the two Queens of Upper East Side - something they lived and breathed for.

Chuck leaned on one of the posters of her bed, connected with the white canopy above it. "And here I thought you were getting soft," his smirking eyes found her own.

The soft sigh she let out wildly contrasted with the intention behind her words. "I'm a woman of simple pleasures, just some public humiliation and ruined career prospects."

"Diabolical," said Bass before tumbling onto her fluffy white bedsheets and stretching like a satisfied cat. "So this is your bed, huh?" he smirked at his own implication as he watched Thea's face morph into a scowl.

She was quick to grab one of her monogrammed pillows and hit the Bass heir until he got up, laughing all the way to the door. "Leaving now. You can repay me another time," he added with a promiscuous wink, touching her waist as he passed her.

"Yeah, bye," she responded, voice dripping with sarcasm. Just as she was about to slam the door into his face, one of his dress shoes blocked their way to the door frame.

"Pizza Friday with Nate, after the mixer?" Chuck asked her. It was a tradition she and Nate started years ago, ordering some greasy, cheap pizza as a treat after an exhausting school week, and renting some classic movie. Last year Nate brought Chuck along and it just stuck that way — it definitely helped that he brought another exotic bottle of alcohol every time he came around.

With a groan and a nod she agreed, stretching her hand forward to push him from the frame. "Always. Now shoo!"  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


"This is likely the most important mixer of our lives," Thea preached, one hand tightly around a glass of spiked punch and the other waving around the air with exited motions.

For the Upper East Side's privileged youth, the Ivy Week was the ticket to the superstar afterparty; if you impressed the representative of your chosen university, all you had to do was pass your exams and the spot was yours. And to be fair, hardly any of them lacked the charisma to charm the reps. Well — there _was_ the Humphrey boy.

The girl took a careful sip of her drink so as not to damage her lipstick, observing her fellow classmates buzzing around the notable professors, most with their parents in tow. "Who are you ushering for?" She asked her fellow conspirator who leaned on one of the pillars in the courtyard.

With a signature smug Bass smirk he nodded his head to the right. "Princeton," she followed his eyes that were centred on an older, but undeniably beautiful woman currently chatting with one of the football players — was it Jake? Or Lance, the one she dated two years ago? Well, it could've been Michael for all she cared or knew.

"Yes! Go introduce me to the representative," Thea demanded, already tugging on Chuck's suit sleeve like a child in a candy shop.

"Please Chuck, I've been dreaming of going to Princeton for as long as I've known what is it. I need to worm into her good graces," she sulked, futilely. He wouldn't budge, simply sipping his drink. Carefully, she stepped closer so she could whisper on his ear with a breathy voice, summoning all the sensuality she could muster in that moment. "Come on, Bass, _please_."

What she did not expect at all was Chuck gripping her waist and holding her in place while he returned the favour, bringing his lips near her neck. _Two can play this game._

"I was thinking about worming into something else entirely," she wasn't sure if she was talking about the rep or her, she wasn't entirely sure what was the irritating feeling washing over her either, but it could hardly be good news. So she pushed him away, the foundation on her face concealing the blush that threatened to creep up her neck and up her cheeks.

"You're absolutely hopeless," she scowled, making her way to the elegant woman standing a few feet away from them.

"Miss Felder?" The brunette adjusted her blazer, pushing one of her classmates out of the way and offering the woman her hand to shame. "My name is Thea Johnson, I was looking forward to meeting you. Your recent work on crisis predictions has been groundbreaking," and she wasn't even lying.

"Oh thank you, it's not often that young people get interested in financial economics. But I suspect we can thank your family for that," the woman smiled, Thea's insides immediately turning sour. _Of course, that's the first thing she would remark on._

"One day I hope to build a name for myself ma'am, with no help from either side of my family. And I hope Princeton might become my springboard into that endeavour," she launched into the long speech she had been preparing for weeks now, accumulating all kinds of factual data she could dig up in the thick volumes she mulled over throughout the summer. Blair found it hilarious, and nerdy, but ended up simply rolling her eyes every time Thea popped up in the pool with the latest _Business Week_ in her grasp.

She commended the rep for her patience, really. "Well, I certainly hope to see you for the open day, young lady," the woman's warm smile gave her a reassurance. "Dean Powell would certainly be pleased with such a fine addition to our alumni lineup."

"Please, ma'am, you make me blush," Thea grinned, spying Blair waving for her to come over to the stage. _Show time._

Plastering on her best apologetic smile, she turned to the usher. "Oh, if you could please excuse me," before she joined her best friend on the stage.

With a slight cough and a tap to the microphone, the Waldorf girl steered the attention of the crowd. "Can I please have everyone's attention?" They smiled at the audience, pointedly ignoring the venomous looks thrown at them by Serena. _Oh, if only she knew what was coming._

"Welcome again to the Constance Billard/St. Jude's Ivy mixer. I'm Blair Waldorf, chair of the community outreach committee," she made a sidestep for Thea to speak into the mic. "And I'm Thea Johnson, co-chair of the committee."

"Every year our schools choose to support one local institution that we feel benefits our community. This year our schools have chosen to honour the Ostroff Centre," From their elevated position on the stage, Thea and Blair could see the entire Van Der Woodsen clan squirm in their places, sharing a worried look as their dirty little secret made its way out in the open.

"This year's choice is a very personal one because the centre has helped one of our own," she paused for the sake of dramatics. "It's because of their excellent programme which aids so many young addicts and alcoholics, that a student here with us today is clean and sober... at least for now. Can I please have Serena Van Der Woodsen join me on stage?" All the heads in the crowed turned to look at the flabbergasted blonde.

Forced to climb up on the stage, Serena hesitantly threw looks over her shoulder. "Don't try to deny it, Chuck saw you," Blair hissed under her breath, a charming grin never leaving her face as she led the crowd into a round of applause for Serena.

The blonde wrung her fingers in anxiety, trying not to look at the faces sending her pitying looks. "Hi, I'm Serena Van Der Woodsen. I just wanna thank my friends," she turned to look at the smiling pair behind her. "Blair Waldorf and Thea Johnson for recognising the Ostroff Centre and all of the good things that they do."

Thea couldn't help but look for her partner in crime's in the crowd, a genuine smile spreading over her lips when she met Chuck's impressed gaze. _They did make a fine marauding pair._

Their _honoured_ speaker took a deep breath. "In the Ostroff Centre, one of the main things that we learn is forgiveness. In order to move forward for our future, we must forgive those who have wronged us in the past. And we ourselves must ask for forgiveness from those whom we've wronged," she was clearly looking at Blair and Thea now, trying to move them with her speech. All three of them were tired from this war, but the resident queen b's couldn't simply forgive and forget.

"Without this forgiveness, innocent people get hurt-" Serena trailed off before Blair snatched the microphone from her hand with a strained smile.

Thea pushed their former friend back into the crowd of Ivy ushers and classmates, eager to get rid of her before she continued to talk. "Thank you Serena! Thank you! Thank you!" Honesty may the best policy in some zip codes, but not in this one and not this week because _I Was a Teenage Drug Addict_ is not exactly a winning college essay, and the two wicked queens were looking for just that.  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Two crystal glasses collided with a satisfying clink, making the two brunettes smirk. Was there anything more satisfying than a job well done? Hardly, Thea concluded, especially when the end result was so deliciously humiliating for the victim.

Their victory celebration was, however, cut short by a furious _Hey!_ coming from behind them, a flop of blond hair belonging to Eric Van Der Woodsen stomping their way.

"Serena is not a patient at the Ostroff Centre!" snapped Eric, glaring up the two girls that were once his sister's best friends.

Blair simply chuckled, giving him a patronising smile. "Eric, you've always been a sweet kid and I understand you are trying to protect your sister."

" _I_ am," Eric blurted out, making Blair and Thea share equally flabbergasted looks.

"Listen kid, that's cute and all, but I've never seen you have a drink," Thea scoffed slightly at the boy's lame attempt to defend his lying, backstabbing sister.

Eric gave them a smile that could only be described as pity. "I'm not an alcoholic," he replied. "I did this-" he pulled up the sleeve of his shirt only to reveal a glaring white scar that stretched over his wrist. Thea's stomach plunged into the abyss.

"And today, Serena protected me."

The Johnson heiress couldn't form a proper sentence as Blair tried to pop out something akin to an apology. She knew, there was no way you could get forgiveness for something like this with an apology.

"Eric I-I-" Blair stuttered only to be cut off by him.

" _See that coming,_ " Eric glared at the two, "Well, that must be a shock for two people who always seemed to think that they know everything!"

As soon as Eric was gone, leaving with his family, Thea moved away from Blair, feeling the nausea bubble up in her stomach. The brunette had turned several shades whiter, contemplating whether to go empty the bile rising up her throat or perhaps fuel it with another dose of dry martini.

"Hey, what happened?" Chuck reached over to touch her arm, setting his drink on one of the tables near by. He'd never seen her so upset to the point of tears gathering in her eyes. If anything, he expected her to be bubbling with glee after the diabolical show they put up.

Her mind still hazy from the dramatic revelation, Thea slightly swayed on her feet. "I think we fucked up," she whispered loud enough for him to hear her over the lively music of the band.

One of her tanned hands latched onto his wrist like a lifeline. "Can you take me home?" She felt positively stupid for acting so childish, so weak, when she was supposed to be twirling around the reps. Instead here she was, asking her best friend's best friend to take her home.

If there was one thing Thea never, ever joked about was suicide. Even when Blair or Serena threw a passing, joking jab like _God, I hope she drops dead_ and _Ugh, just die, thanks,_ she made sure to give them a sharp telling off or a glare. It was one matter no one in her vicinity was allowed to abuse.

Chuck's eyes scanned the crowd for the familiar mop of brown hair that went by the name of Nate, but the only person he could spot was The Captain. "Sure, want me to get Nate, too?" He was answered by a shake of her dark curls.

"No, he has enough on his plate right now," nodding, he gently grabbed her hand, uncaring if anyone saw that the infamous Chuck Bass actually had an emphatic bone in his body, and led her outside.  
  
  


* * *

The ride back to the Johnson residence was a quiet one save the rumbling of the limo's engine and the two's soft breaths. Thea's head rested comfortably on Chuck's shoulder, his hand grasping hers as an anchor, grounding even while the elevator bolted up and into her vast penthouse.

Heels were left haphazardly by the entrance as soon as she was through the doors, followed by the jacket Chuck gallantly offered her despite her protests finding a place over a white, leather chair.

For a moment Chuck felt out of place and purpose as he watched the girl make herself at home, tapping away on the glass panel in the hallway until the entire penthouse was basked in soft light, and a out of the row of shelves emerged an enormous flat screen.

Opting to go quietly now that she was safely at home, he reached for his jacket and made his way to the elevator down the carpeted hall. He could swear the portraits of Thea's extended family that lined the endless hallway followed his steps with quiet, judgemental eyes.

"You can stay," he turned to look at her curiously more than anything, lowering his hand from the elevator button. A moment later she felt the blood rush traitorously to her cheeks. "If you want. I mean, it's Friday."

Chuck let his eyes flitter across the living room where the television was, and the lithe figure of Theodora Johnson awkwardly shifting from one leg to another, trying to look at everything except from him. He had to admit, the flustered look was cute on her.

"Unless you have some hot chick waiting for you in your suite," she was quick to roll her eyes, but Chuck Bass only had one person in mind to spend the rest of the night with, the leggy Princeton representative long gone from his memory.

"The questions is," he threw on one of his famous grins, quick to shrug his jacket off and grab Thea's hand with his outstretched one. "What are we watching?" Chuck threw over his shoulder as he tugged her towards the living room.

A thankful smile spread over her lips, scooting a bit to the right to make a spot for the Bass boy when they sat down. By the time they were ten minutes into _Casino Royale_ , the two teenagers were already asleep, Thea stretched over Chuck's chest, one of his arms carefully wrapped around her waist and nose almost touching the top of her hair.

And for a night, all was good.  
  
  


 **s** **ᴏ** **ᴡʜᴀᴛ** **ᴡɪʟʟ** **ɪᴛ** **ʙᴇ** **?** **ᴛʀᴜᴄᴇ** **ᴏʀ** **ᴄᴏɴ** **s** **ᴇ** **ǫ** **ᴜᴇɴᴄᴇ** **s?** **ᴡᴇ** **ᴀʟʟ** **ᴋɴᴏᴡ** **ᴏɴᴇ** **ɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ** **ᴄᴀɴ** **'** **ᴛ** **ʜᴀᴠᴇ** **ᴛᴡᴏ** **ǫ** **ᴜᴇᴇɴ** **s,** **ʟᴇᴛ** **ᴀʟᴏɴᴇ** **ᴛʜʀᴇᴇ** **.** **ᴡʜᴀᴛ** **ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴ** **s** **ɴᴇ** **x** **ᴛ** **?** **ᴏɴʟʏ** **ᴛɪᴍᴇ** **ᴡɪʟʟ** **ᴛᴇʟʟ** **.**  
 **x** **ᴏ** **x** **ᴏ** **ɢᴏ** **ss** **ɪᴘ** **ɢɪʀʟ** **.**


	5. iv. bad news baizen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a blast from the past threatens our usual suspects

* * *

**iv. bad news baizen**

* * *

**WHEN THEA WALKED INTO** the Waldorf residence that morning, the last thing she expected was to stumble upon a rather domestic scene of Eleanor Waldorf and Serena chatting on the couch, both of them with a cup of tea in their hand.

"Good morning," she greeted tentatively, stepping into the sitting room. Eleanor immediately set her cup down, ushering the girl to step in.

"Thea, darling, how wonderful of you to join is! Come sit with us, I was just telling Serena that Bendels is interested in carrying my line."

"Oh Eleanor, that's fantastic. Congrats," the girl grinned back at her mother figure, sharing in the enthusiasm. As much as she was confused by Serena's presence in the Waldorf home, she didn't let it deter from her usual appearances.

Thankfully, Dorota was quick to approach her, "Can I get you anything, Miss Thea? A nice green tea and a scone? I know how much you like them," the Polish woman greeted her warmly, taking the jacket out of her hands.

"Thanks, Dorota."

The maid smiled and turned to the kitchen, nearly bumping into a sleepy Blair, just coming down the staircase. Serena was first to notice the petite brunette, immediately sitting up,

"Hey, you're up," she greeted hesitantly. Thea sunk down into the cushions of the sofa, observing the exchange.

"Do we have plans?" Blair asked, looking between Serena and Thea in confusion.

"Darling, it's impolite to interrupt," Eleanor scolded her daughter, "I was just telling Serena and Thea that Bendels is interested in carrying my line."

Blair, who had just sat down on the sofa next to Thea, smiled excitedly, "Really? That's fantastic! Why didn't you say something?"

"I came back from Paris early to put together my look book. If they like what they see, it could be the beginning of an entire lifestyle collection," Eleanor explained just as Dorota arrived with Thea's tea and scone. She mouthed a silent thank you to her and immediately tucked into the warm pastry.

"Cause more people should be like you, mother." Blair agreed happily, reaching to take a bite out of one of the delectable, buttery croissants laid out in front of them.

"And before you tuck into that, you might find the low-fat yoghurt more appealing," Eleanor clipped with a tight smile. Blair's face immediately dropped, leaving the pastry and sitting back down.

"I lost two pounds while you were away," said Blair quietly. Thea's heart broke into pieces, shooting daggers at Eleanor's turned back. She reached for her best friend's hand over the soft, gripping it tightly.

Eleanor and Serena had stood up to view the clothes on the racks all over the living room, leaving the two other girls to sit in silence.

"The dress design is amazing," Serena complimented, taking one of the dresses and holding it in front of her.

"Serena you have to come back later when everything is unpacked. I would love to hear your thoughts; you do have such great personal style." Eleanor complimented excitedly. 

"Thank you, but I don't think we'll be able to. Blair and I have plans today," Serena explained to Blair's mother. Thea pursed her lips tightly. Of course, Serena wouldn't include her in whatever plans she had made. It would be stupid of her to think the obvious rivalry between them would disappear in an instant.

Blair's head shot up from the yoghurt she was nibbling on, "We do?" She quickly closed her mouth moments later, understanding the cue. Thea, on the other hand, both satiated by the breakfast and the portion of family drama far too early in the morning, decided it was time to go,

"Right, as much as I'm thrilled about this," she vaguely showed at the three of them, getting up from the sofa and leaving her empty tea cup and plate on the table, "I gotta go and babysit your boyfriend and my other best friends. Wish me luck."

**Serena and Blair may have projects today,** **but Nate and Chuck are overbookés for all weekend ... if they survive.**

**And what is Thea doing in an all boys company?** **We never thought you were _that_ desperate, Johnson.**

The Palace penthouse was gleaming from the thorough clean it was given in expectation of one of the wildest weekends a blatantly rich, hedonism driven teenager like Chuck could throw. Thea realised, with a mournful look to the polished marble surface of the bar, that the flat would need much more than a deep clean after next couple of days.

"It's a _Piaget_."

"Can't you just call it a watch?" Nate rolled his eyes. For a Vanderbilt descendant, Thea always found him a bit too humble, though she could understand the weight of a family name on young shoulders. They all could.

Chuck threw Nate a sharp glance, as if daring him to disrespect his prized possession even further, "If it costs more than ten bricks, it deserves its own name."

Nate sighed, looking around the room, "And that?" He picked up a baseball with a neatly written autograph on its side.

Chuck took it from his hands, "Definitely that. Babe Ruth's call shot. The most famous homer he had ever hit."

He placed both objects into one of the cabinets on the west wall of the apartment, locking it up and hiding the key for a good measure.

"Better safe than sorry," he explained, seeing Nate's confused face.

"I think I'm already sorry for saying yes," she showed her phone screen to the boys, featuring the newest blast about the forthcoming weekend. "Gossip Girl not so subtly called me a slut."

Chuck took the phone from her hand, frowning slightly, "Want me to beat her up?"

Thea snorted slightly, taking her phone back, "Yeah, sure darling, you do that."

She'd be stupid to deny that the attention suited her. Sure, all of the boys invited were not worthy of her second glance, but there was something undeniably fun about having them wrapped around her little finger.

Seconds later, the elevator door opened, bringing in the first group of guys. Chuck got up, fixing his shirt one last time. He turned to Thea, offering his hand,

"Ready to go?"

"Born ready," she stood up from her seat on the couch, straightening the invisible creases on her dress as she took her place in front of the gaggle of boys lucky enough to be invited to the event of the year.

"Here we go! You survived the week and Ivy have fortunately gained entry to a ticket for the school of your choice. Now, ruining the chance. Let me remind you the rules. From now, the only outside world is the one we showed you, you eat what we I give you and you do what we tell you, and until further notice the only girls whom you speak are the ones Charles paid for."

The crowd gave a rambunctious cheer, quickly silenced by Chuck stepping forward to wrap his arm around Thea's waist.

"Except Thea, she's off limits and she's too expensive for any you," he made sure to shoot a warning look to all of the hormonal young men before raising his half-drunk glass of scotch. 

"Let the weekend of debauchery begin!"

The pleasant buzz of expensive alcohol and mind numbing conversations lulled the guests in jolly atmosphere. Content with the organization, Thea leaned on the bar, signaling for the hired bartender for a fresh drink. It was nearly perfect, at least until she heard;

"Who brought the yeti?"

Thea's stomach plunged once she spotted the familiar tuffts of dirty blond hair mingling through the crowd.

"Isn't that Carter Baizen? I haven't seen him since he was a senior and we were in the eighth grade!" Nate pointed out excitedly, nearly bouncing on his feet to take a better look at the guy in question,"He looks serious."

Chuck glanced over at Nate as he took in this new development, and just gave Nate a look that asked if he were serious, "Are you high? He looks like Matthew McConaughey between movies." Obviously not impressed with this new Carter at all he continued,

"The guy's a loser; anyone who trades their trust fund for a fanny pack flies in the face of all that is holy to Chuck Bass."

Thea sipped on the drink in her hand with unhidden contempt, "Please, he's got nothing on Matthew. Baizen looks like he just crawled from some weed-smoking, organic, hippie cult shack," she screwed her face,

"Disgusting. I smell an anti-materialist campaign in our monthly horoscope."

Unfortunately, the cost of hosting a party was the fact that you would inevitably be obliged to greet every single guest, and as Carter Baizen neared their little friend group with a self-satisfied smirk and a pretentious swagger, Chuck wished he could turn his blood into alcohol.

"Nate Archibald, is that you?"

Nate stepped forward to one-arm hug the older teen, "Baizen, buddy! I heard that you had become a rogue!"

"And I'm here to talk about it," Baizen sported a wide smile, his hands casually tucked into the pockets of his trousers.

Thea turned to Chuck with an over exaggerated eye roll and a scoff to accompany it, "Oh please, can he not talk about it?"

Hearing her comment, the older boy turned to the brunette with a smirk.

"Hello, Thea, I see you haven't changed much."

The thing was, she and Carter had a history. Well, it wasn't much of a history as the fact that once upon a time, a little over a year ago, little Thea Johnson had a crush on him. She pulled all her courage and asked him out, and on the day they were supposed to meet up, Carter didn't show up. Instead, she was left to wait in front of the ice skating rink for hours, freezing and heartbroken.

The cherry on the top of that night was a nasty Gossip Girl blast featuring photos of her sitting on a bench, quietly crying. From then on, Thea steeled her heart from any emotions, saving her tears for the confines of her childhood bedroom, and locking her heart away for good.

"Can't say the same, Carter. Travelling doesn't suit your complexion."

Carter's smirk curled sourly, "Awh, Thea, still bitter over how we ended thing? I thought you'd be over that after all this time?"

Thea saw red before her, the sheer force of her grip in her champagne flute nearly cracking the thing. "Ha! You must think you're so memorable, Baizen. Get over yourself or get run over."

**It looks like someone did not anticipate the intruder. Thea, looks like your old flame is stirring up the dust. Or is it even a flame if there was no spark on both ends?**

**And doesn't Chuck know a party isn't a party until someone crashes?**

"So I don't understand, the last time I saw your sister she said that your family had locked you out and you've fallen off of the face of the earth," Nate was absorbed into Carter's retelling of his past year, hanging on each and every of his words.

"No, I just wandered in their own area. Once embezzled money, you see that it does not buy freedom but rather a prison. They said I had gone but I just escaped."

"You went where?" Nate pressed on, leaning on his hand.

"Where?" Baizen chuckled as if it was amusing, "I helped clean up after Katrina, spent a year rebuilding Machu Picchu, which, let me tell you, my life has changed. I bought a digital camera and filmed for a documentary."

Suddenly, Chuck could take Baizen's preaching anymkre and snapped, "You're the guy that gave us our first joint, snuck into our first club, and you're going to tell me the life of a youtube filmmaker is better than this?" His every word raised the tone of disbelief,

"You've invented the weekend of debauchery."

Nate, uncharacteristically quick to defend his new spiritual Superman, cut in, "Hey. Who cares about a party when you can travel the world?"

"I just fly to a party destination. You know, Greece, Ibiza, saves much more time," Thea grumbled behind her glass of something bubbly.

Obviously ignoring her, Carter fully turned to Nate who was listening to him attentively, "Exactly! In the real world, the only thing that matters is who you are, not what you possess."

Thea was just preparing to add to his cheesy, selfless tirade when her phone chimed with the familiar tune. She frowned slightly,

Need you asap, please. B x

"Well, I love this speech on non-material need a guy who has as much product in his hair, This party is about excess, not expedition. Stop talking. Start partying," Chuck stressed.

He wrapped his arms around both of the girls' waist and jokes, "Now here's something that doesn't require much material! As a matter of fact, they're about to come off. Who's with me?"

Thea got up from her barstool, pocketing the phone in her hands, "I've got an sos from Blair so I'm leaving you gentlemen. Don't have too much fun without me,"

"Shame you won't be joining me, Johnson," quipped Chuck, trying to lighten her mood. She cracked a brief smile, rolling her eyes,

"In your dreams, Bass."

"You always are," Chuck watched her move through the crowd and towards the elevator before he turned to his other friend,

"Nathaniel?"

Carter and Nate looked at each other before Nate speaks, "I think we're just going to hang out here for a bit."

"Fine. I hate to break up a matched set anyway."

Trying not to show how hurt he was not hearing the rest of the conversation transpiring between Carter and Nate.

"—If we went around a few cards? That shit for the kids, Texas hold'em died. I'll show you the real action. You know what? I am part of the weekly game in this borough of Queens, it lasts all night. This is the real game: high stakes, big money, people with stories that would raise mine for anything. You ... you should come."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

**A DAY LATER,** Thea was flipping through her coursework on her bedcovers, trying to keep her eyes open. She hadn't been sleeping well again, the sporadic bouts of insomnia plaguing her again. Just as she decided to finally rest her head on the algebraic formula, her phone buzzed impatiently,

"T? We have a situation," Chuck's voice said from the other end. Thea groaned slightly, already throwing her legs over the side of the bed,

"Let me guess, does it revolve around Nate and his new buddy-buddy Baizen?" She asked, knowing full well it was the only possible answer. The Johnson heiress wasn't sure if she could guarantee she wouldn't commit a homicide that evening,

"Always so perceptive, Johnson. Meet me in fifteen, The Palace reception."

"Yes, your royal Bassness."

**SURE ENOUGH, IN LESS THAN** twenty minutes Chuck's limo was testing the speed limit towards Queens, the two equally concerned teenagers sitting together in the back.

"How did you know where he was? He wasn't showing up on Gossip Girl map," Thea asked Chuck, scrolling through the newest notifications from the infamous blogger.

"I had one of my guys discreetly follow him ever since Baizen became a bigger nuisance than expected. And I'm glad I did that, our mutual friend seems to have gotten himself well over his head," Chuck rubbed a hand over his face, his patience already worn thin and seemingly nonexistent.

Thea narrowed her eyes at him, "Don't you dare ever have someone follow me," she threatened, bright eyes turning into slits.

"Oh please, I always know where you are," Chuck scoffed slightly, extending his legs to hit her shoes with his own,

"Your daily routine is so predictably boring."

Thea shoved him back with equal force, the point of her flats digging into his shin, "And your's unexpected enough to make page six every week."

They arrived to their destination, a shady little hotel at the edge of Queens, with a tight knot in their stomachs and sweaty palms concealed in their coat pockets. It took a solid bribe to make the man in front of it let them in, courtesy of Chuck, and from there on they followed the sounds of shouting.

"Just give them the money man, money means nothing to you. These guys aren't playing, but no one has to get hurt. I'm trying to help you out." Thea and Chuck exchanged a concerned look, rounding a corner to see their friend being restrained by four guys. It was Carter who was threatening him, of course, Thea tough grimly, and it took her all the willpower she had not to roll up her sleeves and fight the older boy herself.

That's when Chuck decided to make their presence known, "Yeah you're a real friend."

Other occupants in the room snapped their hands towards the two teenagers, "Who let you two in here?" Carter scowled, turning away from Nate.

Nate yelled out to Chuck as he tried to wiggle free from his captures, "He set me up!"

Carter was quick to correct Nate, not taking his eyes off of Chuck, "No one forced his hand, your boy lost fair and square."

"Look man if you don't give them the money right away, I'm going to tell everyone where you live, and they can come get it from your daddy. What do you think about that?" Carter stepped closer to Nate, his tone of voice threatening.

By that point, Thea was seeing red. She took a step forward, narrowing her blazing eyes at the boy that left her standing out in the cold all those years ago. "You think you're so high and mighty, threatening a high schooler like this, you chewed up piece of—"

Chuck had to cut her off before she continued, "Look, you got my watch and my ball," stating it as a fact, not a question as Carter flinched a bit as Chuck continued, "You can keep them. Take care of these guys, I don't call the cops, and we walk out of here."

A beat of tense silence passed between the two groups, as the options were laid out and weighted. Carter brought one hand to his forehead with a disappointed sigh.

"It's cool, I got it," Carter told his goons, who reluctantly released their grips on Nate.

The three of them exited the building as quickly as their feet could take them, the cold air slapping their flushed cheeks. Once finally inside the limo, Thea assessed Nate for any external damage, the cuts and bruises that would show their purple and green shades in the next couple of hours.

"The two of you would be long dead in a ditch somewhere in Bronx without me," she scowled deeply, then turned again to Nate. When he registered that she had her purse in her hand it was already too late,

"Idiot," whack, "moron," whack, "utter basta–"

The Archibald heir shielded his face from his friend's vicious Prada, "Okay, okay! I get it, I messed up real bad and I am so sorry."

"Oh, I'll be reminding you of how badly you messed up for then next few decades, don't you worry," Thea begrudgingly stopped hitting him, settling back into her seat with a final glare at the blond teenager.

The ride back to The Palace was uncommonly silent, with Chuck sitting between Thea and Nate in case the former decided to truly strangle her friend for his childish behaviour.

"I'm gonna have to transfer some money, and pray that the Captain doesn't notice before I find a way to put it back," Nate said out loud to himself once the reached Chuck's suite, reaching for his laptop on the coffee table.

"You know you don't have to pay me back," Chuck assured him, his friend already logging into his account, "I mean it was worth every cent to see the last of that guy."

"I really hope that's the last we see of him," said Thea, kicking off her shoes by the doorway and draping herself over the sofa the most dramatic was possible. She turned her head towards Chuck, slouched in the armchair opposite of her, "Order me something from the kitchen. With carbs. Lots of them, and bacon."

The brunet just snorted, grabbing the phone off its stand. "Spoiled brat," he said, but the smile was still there.

"I want to," Nate insisted as he turned to look at Chuck to show his sincerity, "I mean it, thanks."

"Blair and Serena are burying the hatchet, apparently. Look." She help up her phone's screen, showing the newest Gossip Girl blast about the two being spotted around Manhattan. They were all dressed up in what appeared to be Eleanor's new line, grinning and posing for the camera. Thea couldn't help but feel a twinge of something bitter in her chest.

Of course, Chuck must have caught the millisecond of an emotion, immediately leaning forward. "What about you, where do you stand with little miss page six? You can't deny she made your blood boil even before her mysterious disappearance."

Thea shot him a venomous glare, ready to shoot back something half stinging and half honest, only to be interrupted by a new alert from Gossip Girl.

**As much as a BFF can make you go WTF there's no denying that you'd all be a little less rich without them. And Serena and Blair? They do besties better than anyone. And where does Thea come in the equation?**

"That can't be right..." Thea couldn't agree more, but she had a feeling Nate wasn't talking about the joyful reconciliation of Serena and Blair.

Instead, when she looked up from her screen, her best friend had turned several shades paler, holding the palm of his hand over his mouth in shock.

"It says that I'm zeroed out!" Nate exclaimed.

"Maybe you have the wrong account?" Chuck tried to rationalize, surprisingly, for the first time in his life.

"No, no, no, there must be something wrong. I accessed this account last month and it said that there was almost 200 thousand," Nate stated, already on his feet and franticly searching through his contact list.

"Hey Tom, thanks for getting back to me so quickly. I was checking my account and I came across what I assume to be an error and that my trust seems to have a zero balance...?"

In the living room, Thea and Chuck exchanged a worried glance as they watched their best friend pacing around the kitchen on the phone to his family's accountant. Though not spoken aloud, the sinking feeling in their gut told them that maybe there was much more to the sudden tensions and mysteries in the Archibald family, and it was only a matter of time before the burst out in the open.


End file.
